Its A Gift To You

These mixed feeling, I'm typing down,
Really strange and funny, climbing up n down,
I saw you for the first time, about ten years from now,
And would be there forever, that's my vow,
But, feels like, you moved in, just a day or two
In your casuals, I'm not sure, green or blue
With your specs on, and with a hesitated smile,
To really capture that moment, it took me a while,
You walked in, after the assembly, with your cousin,
My eyes wide open and like time's frozen,
Your eyes had the view of the entire class,
Those shiny eyes, behind the glass,
But mine, just had you,
You, the beautiful, I'm not sure, green or blue.
Days passed, and then months,
Meanwhile my heart knitting that sweet labyrinths,
'i love a girl', I said,
With all the memory and courage I had,
'you are too young for it', said my cousin,
What he meant, he knew, I doesn't,
That day, left me with a question,
Far away from the premises of education,
'i'm too young to love someone',
What does he mean,
'What do I exactly need to have in?'
Like they say in chemistry, Sodium or Chlorine,
And meanwhile, I developed the habit of watching humans, beautiful ones,
Sitting right after your desk, waving my life in different tones,
The habit of watching beautiful cloud,
I just now said your name, heard it or want me to say it aloud,
Years after years I was growing,
The strange boat, along, was rowing,
And growing was my heart,
With you too becoming a beautiful part,
To me, you were a person, rest from the billions,
There, to you, I was a person, one among those rest-of-billions,
Everyday you walked in into the class,
Like disturbing my morning grass,
Like, I've achieved for which I was there,
Like, mine n your's hearts do really cohere,
I don't even remember when do we even became friends,
A sunny day, restless on Arabian sands,
Eventually you transformed from a cloud to a line,
These words describes you, or I can say, define,
Like that line, passing right from the heart,
Joining or separating the two parts,
Like they show in pictures,
Yes, right there,in those boring lectures,
I was damn crazy for any info about you,
I collected things, related to you,
And linked many along the way,
At least if not you, these are the things which are gonna stay,
Right from the last row,
In that silence, near the window,
From there, I watched you,
Now the girl, who always wore blue,
Loved that time, when we talked,
I've kept those memories safe, preserved, stocked,
Hearing your sweet giggle,
Melting the heart, creating a reigle,
And your eyes, my god your eyes,
I saw, and then, just time flies,
Sometimes I just looked into them,
And then silence, something like the anthem,
A perfect shape, and those browns inside,
And a magic, they really abide,
Strange power they got, noise cancellation,
There's no one around, giving you that type of sensation,
It seemed like, the world is still, and the crowd is silent,
I forgot the pain, sorrow or ailment,
I couldn't even used to hear to your words,
Neither the noises, traffic or the birds,
Those beautiful leafs, behind those glasses,
'Have a look as she passes',
Those group projects with you,
Full of energy like diet mountain dew,
Those giggling chit chats, entire lecture,
Those silly jokes, those magnificent laughters,
Those indirect sarcastic fights,
Squeezed my heart, held so tight,
All those memories, perfectly photographed,
Passed, when I cried, smile, worried, laughed,
Kept into my life's albums,
Whose pages turn over every moment, with the memory storms,
Whenever you passed by me,
That moment, like...'gee!',
My heart started pounding,
Audible to the ears, could hear it sounding,
Like, the whole of my inside would come out in a puke,
I'm still alive, maybe a fluke,
I felt so strong and so weak around you, both at the same time,
Both terrified and enthusiastic, at the same time,
Like a rain in summers, but like a storm at the reaping season, both, the same time,
Both in love and in pain, at the same time.
Sometimes when you cried, in the class,
I just can't let that memory pass,
Maybe because of the pain who have,
Or some deep scars, you secretly have,
I had strange conversations in my head,
I felt like wiping off your tears, experiencing your grief, feeling bad,
My brain, always saw the other part of you,
A part, which you could never see. Ya, not even you,
I loved to have debates with you,
That just because it showed me inside of you,
And took me to the person, who you were,
Your different shapes and the colors,
I never opened myself up, or got carried away,
Cuz I never found a reason, nor a way,
I never wanted to marry, then this love would have lead to what?
Ya that was tactic, 'love and shut'
I suffered just a part, called pain,
This arms, this chest, this brain,
I knew this love's gonna hurt,
Like a polished china in dirt,
But, what could I've done,
Serious things are never a fun,
Maybe that was the only thing, I knew a bit, love,
To keep it up, I sacrificed, maybe the white pigeon or the dove,
I am not way too smart maybe,
I am not way too handsome maybe,
But that just makes me who I am,
I assume, the favorite, be it a sir or a ma'am,
That farewell day in the school,
Now, I may sound like, I was such a fool,
I brought a 'Friends Forever' band,
And would have made you to promise to keep it on your hand,
Maybe destiny didn't allowed me,
Or it's not the way Its meant to be,
Either you were too busy, or I was too nervous,
Sometimes I smile, and think, how stupid I was,
And the together-time came to an end,
And as far I can picturise, the sad-celebrations were quite grand,
Just after we got separated,
Although, for a year or a two I waited,
You fell for a guy,
That whole night, all I did was just, cry,
Really, he is not right for you,
Don't hate me cuz I write the truth,
No, I wouldn't ever lie to you,
But it was really hard to loose you,
I wait till today,
To return to that same Arabian bay,
In a hope you will return,
Healing me, cooling off this burn,
I was shattered,
These eyes filled with brutality and hatred,
I kept, listening to sad songs, talking about love,
Like the green day's 'oh love, ohh loove...',
But, for an unexplainable reason, it hurt me too,
When that guy hurt you,
I wished to force him to turn you happy,
Who left you as Skelton and body cuppy,
But, how would have fulfilled that one, if none of my wishes ever drizzled,
Your heart was broken, and thoughts puzzled,
Once again you were lost,
Conservative, like a fog or a frost,
I felt sorry for your conditions,
And who won't for such a sweet girl with ambitions,
You had a tough time,
A heart break, a physical disease, loosing a family member. Really made me cryin',
Your crying face wandering my head,
Oh god give me powers so that I can cheer her, can't you see, she is sad,
Everytime I meet you,
Always finds you wearing some blue,
The whole flashback starts,
As like I shape the crafts,
Like everything is there in your eyes,
Ya, everything is visible in your eyes,
The time you came and the time you got apart,
The time I was at cloud nine, and the time I got hurt,
I could never had a blissful time with you,
Wearing a nice tuxedo, and leather shoe,
With a coffee smell in air,
And candles lit all over,
Still, sometimes I wish you were there for me too,
Like I've been for you,
Some of them have got faded now,
Some of the photographs, still are tightly stow,
But the thing which i didn't forgot,
And can even recite, if gun fires are shot,
Is that I still love you,
From the day one to now,
And will continue, till the stars would keep shining,
Who knows, how long this pain will keep rhyming,
Pardon me, for making your little secrets a bit public,
Don't worry, everything will pass with just a clocks' tick,
But I am sorry, I couldn't keep them burried in my chest,
I've lost some photographs and so, some rest,
And I've to spill out these emotions, fine if they took the words as the medium,
This story, guess who are, the water, a fish and some pebbles in an aquarium,
Also, forgive me for the mistakes I might have made,
All those inconvenience, I might have laid,
I respect you for the human you've been,
Tough, sweet, kind, and keen.
Don't care for the past, it just gets blew.
I gift my art, and this one is only for you,
You can show everybody,
I might have done it already,
That this is the gift you got,
Apart from, 'I love you a lot',
Things have changed a bit, I know,
But to what extent, who knows,
Well, I can assure, everytime you fall apart,
I'll be there, be it a fort or a cart,
Even if I am not in your life,
You'll always be in mine,
Cuz you resides in my heart.
My friends, love, whatever you takes,
Or the 'no one' barging into your life.

The Lost Dew

After an hour long quarrel,
Finally she got off the barrel,
She fought with her father,
With those courage-flames she gather,
Finally there, following her heart,
In the winter roads, with the cold art,
Beauty, as she walks, no fear,
Keep going. Yes like that, dear,
Ear with plugged in earphones,
One after another stepping with tones,
Pupils relaxed, eyebrows stretched,
And the world, like perfectly sketched,
Enjoying the after meal walk,
Undirected, unplanned, wandering with just nature's talk,
Dark night, white fog, yellow lights, blue shoes,
Orange brain, yellow heart, red eyes, white boes,
Singing songs, waving hands,
Sharing smiles, living grands,
She stopped at sudden, there,
Wait let me see, n then share,
I don't know, what's bothering her,
There's not even any wild animal with fur,
Just two humans, teens probably, crossing the opposite way,Laughing aloud,
And now her eyes, look at her eyes, surrounded by fear cloud,
Her hands stoped waving,
Umm! Heart seems to start craving,
Her footsteps became quieter,
Body stiffed, hands lighter,
What makes her so feared?
Well, I know. The wicked smile of those guys, gives the complete gear,
Let me walk her by,
And get her clear through that guy,
As I went near, she's frightened,
'I'm here to help you, feel lightened'
'Stay away, I can manage,
The number is high on my gunnage'
She was lying, her voice shrank,
Her lips were shivering, eyes half closed, like fully drunk,
'okay. No offence. Don't worry keep walking,
Like the elephants moves and dogs keep barking'
I walked behind her, slowly,
Neck bent, like a jowly,
Saw those brutal animals pass,
No respect, no honour, no class,
'excuse me! Now can we just talk?'
'okay. And thanks, c'mon, lets have a walk'
The walk was silent,
Controlled steps, hearts violent,
'Nice weather!', just to start,
'ya', with a smirk on her heart,
'so nice to walk in winters', I added.
'well, only for you', she threaded,
'ohh, how come , not for you?,
The fog is same white for you too!',
'just only the god, not the animals,
And what else to say, other than that we are gals',
My heart melt, as she recited,
I knew where her words pointed,
Nothing was left to say,
Everything quiet, the street, grey,
A flashback ran in my mind,
Of all those sufferings, which binds,
'Can you elaborate?', just out of curiosity,
'leave it. It's just like the whole pond is dirty',
'what are you feared of exactly?',
'fear of not being alone', her thought, striking abruptly,
'okay'. You, getting her painful words?
'what else I should explain?! Many eyes, many worlds...'
I was lost, drowned into thoughts,
'...n moreover you won't understand', with her rough eyes, drought,
Now she kinda stomped on my heart,
Like when you do understand and not even offered a dart,
A moist film covered my eyes,
Now all those pride. Phew! Flies.
'this is my home. Thanks for the walk', with her eyes still, hands waving,
I managed to wear a smile,I was actually graving,
Weeks passed, she was never again seen,
That beautiful hummingbird, to fly, which was so keen,
Two papers, kept by my side,
Let's write a letter to her and slide,
"It's just a request, think over,
You are strong, don't shower,
Don't fail, never hit the end,
Don't bow, turn wherever you have to bend,
Don't loose, you are not meant to be,
Don't give up, let it be your strength to be,
Don't stop, its not your job,
Don't fear, no matter however big is the mob,
Be a fire, burn it all,
Be a storm, never fall,
Be a rain, never stop,
Be a smoke, never loose hope,
Be a river, never look back,
Be advanced, use the hack,
Be free, be among,
Live fast, die young",
And this one left, I should throw,second one,
Whosoever picks it up, hope to be a crooked one,
"Don't be brutal or a bully,
Respect, treat and let her live fully".

I Don't Care

Its all over now,
Fame, money, love, care,
Promises, trust, faith, vow,
Now I exist, nowhere.
Like the dried leaves rustle,
Then a spark cause fire,
Like the dead heart hustle,
Then a arrow make a vire.
I walked those a thousand like miles,
I creeped for everything good,
I struggled for my life to affiles,
Gathering those fake ornaments of coralwood.
You all just show support for a purpose,
Now, keep that deep inside your pockets,
Cuz your heart is too small for those heavy dose,
Or what u can do is, make a time being docket.
'Can you just tell what's wrong with you,
And why all of your poetry are so blue?'
(Ohh here you come again,
Really curious? Or just wanna hangout with my pain)
'blue poetry! The whole world is blue buddy,
Wanna make it red? Wanna celebrate or be bloody'
'I am not getting you, what are you saying,
What season are you through? Haying?'
'Ok, so you wanna know, what's there,
Let me recite, where my soul and pain cohere,
I feel like, burning inside,
Just wanna listen to shouts, by the brook side,
Everyone is playing me,
Surprised? Say gee,
I walk the silence stairs,
I peek the cruel stares,
Everyone has got a justification,
But I don't wanna listen to any of them,
Don't ask why? Wait. Let me tell
Ya, because it justifies them, and to rest its "Go To Hell",
Reason, cruelty and greed everywhere,
And money, they want in a hypersphere,
Sometimes I just feel to kill someone,
But I don't wanna outgrow Hitler, and be in lonesome,
Like tear them out, cut their flesh,
Drink their blood, and roar, bash,
There is a storm inside my head,
Don't compell me share my life. Its dread,
Everyone one is rushing,
But you know where do life rush? (sushing),
To death. The extreme joy,
Have you ever tasted it boy?
Its really calm, beautiful and fun,
Don't believe? Then why do whosoever dies forget to return?
You all will die some day,
That day, all of your "Life" will go away,
Its so great, it come same to all,
Be you take yourselves as to be brave, intelligent, great or tall,
But why humans turned the way they are,
Are you down there? Or I've came too far?
The bright souls are sleeping as dark slaves,
It'll all end up in the nature's graves,
So, now I don't care,
Any relation, religion, love or affair,
...'
'You're really gone,
By brain, not any muscle or bone,
Can I help you, in any way?
Ok not blue or red. How about grey?'
'ohh, you wanna help me,
What will you offer, tell me,
Cheap sex, red wine,
Or dark poison? Well, I don't mind,
Set me on fire, fry,
Beat me with blades, make me cry,
Poison will help, else,
If you want me to depulse,
Listen, do this for me,
Start living, don't yell as gimme,
Remove all these boundaries,
Religions, communities, race, gender, places, beliefs or countries,
Discuss ideas, not people,
Life is a ball, keep it on dribble,
Keep going on, make it worth living,
Stop taking, develope habit of giving,
Heaven is a place on earth with you,
Tell me if its not just true,
Learn to sacrife, don't worry for loss,
There no other destination then death. Make a toss!
Live it the way its meant to be,
Don't spend it, don't be crazy,
Or do whatever you want,
I don't wanna speak up, to be upfront,
Let me breath with rain,
Let me dance with pain,
Let me cry on what I've gained,
Let me enjoy, counting what I've stained,
Let me sit aside,
Watch you all hide,
Let me grawl,
Let me see love crawl,
Let me lie restless,
Let me drive reckless,
Let me tear this fake dress,
Let me break this heart necklace,
Let me set fire to the world,
This, which spin, twirl,
Let me love the disaster,
Let me bring death a bit faster,
You are still here? Go!
There stands the life, row'.

Thank You, Cruel World

'white lips, pale face,
Breathing in snow flakes',
Ed you describes me well,
This world, am living in, this hell,
These pictures, on the past-wall,
Beautiful now? Not at all,
Those memories, those smiles I had,
'you are my angel', my dad,
Turned black by the world so bad,
Sadly, now the angel is dead,
It was just an another beautiful morrow,
What did it gave? Pain, injustice, grief and sorrow!
Off the fans, dim the lights, shut the doors,
I don't want be out anymore,
Don't even stand by,and dare you to knock,
If you do, be ready for the alpenstock,
Just let me get away,
From what? Those murmurs and affray,
I don't like this sunlight,
Okay now! Hold me tight,
Else I will fall,
And give me a stiff cowl,
I don't trust these smiles you wear anymore,
You, you, you, and you all, what do you count it as? Your score?!
Somebody please call my dad,
For the sake of humanity, if you even had,
I don't feel safe anywhere now,
What are you talking about? That false vow?!
Ohh! Here dad. Come fast,
Make it up, before this body last,
"ya, doll what's the matter,
Stop crying, control this stammer, and utter,
Okay! Okay! Okay! Enough hugs,
What's this, louden this chugs"
I don't wanna say anything,
Is even there something left for? No nothing!
"dad! I wanted to say... That."
"okay! Speak it up. Don't be a bad hat"
What should I utter,
Yes what? These clutter?
Let these scratches shout,
Tell him, what's this all about,
There he goes, like me, numb,
I shout,"those shameless, brutal, beasts, those crumb"
"how?!", with those tears and forehead scar,
Then I recites him the worst story so far,
"don't let this out dear, don't"
I have to nodd, "yes, I won't!"
"you've to get married, don't get unacceptable"
Look who decides it. Those bloody amortizable,
He gets out. Marriage?! Hell no.!
And the reason?! Unacceptable. Ohh!
It just pass like that,
Wham, bam, and what? Guess. Splat,
It doesn't get booked,
Thanks to the society out, crooked,
Ya that f#<{!^g society,
What did it gave? This half paralysed body and anxiety,
You, outside, who always brag about standards and justice,
Save the world. Go. Apply a poultice,
Where did it drowned now. Lost it somewhere?
No? I know. Yes? Why are you arear,
Gently, pick up those heavy papers, the book, the cases,
And do one thing, please. Roll it and shove it up your @$$#$,
Now I don't believe you, anyone,
I say, there are always strings attached, to everyone,
Someone please stand up and fight back,
No one? Ok. Let me cry, paint this picture and put it in my rack,
I don't live now, I just survive,
Hopes, dreams? No. No more acclive,
I breath, it stales,
I climb, it fails,
You be proud, what are you worried about,
I guarantee, no one, not even myself will shout,
You roam, free, have fun,
I guarantee, no one, not even myself will listen,
Because, even I I will ask to,
"its your fault", they'll alto,
They'll listen, and pay attention,
When I commit suicide? I know its an ademption,
You know what? I don't care,
Let there be a social warfare,
Let me shout, am baked,
Let me die, I am girl who was raped.

Heart-Break

Its raining out,alkaline
With a heat flowing, upside down,
Some floods, washing out hearts,
With the brain playing darts,
A little fog in the eyes,
And a little pain, on the bed sides,
The arms numb,
Some of the breath storms,
Taking a silent perspiration shape
Yes! It's a heart Break.
Ok its better it to be talked 'bout,
Let me whisper what my heart shout,
It's not that am not happy,
No! But its better now, not to sound creepy,
You better go, live,
It's not a big deal, all you shook, is just my belief,
It's just a stomp, hard and heart one,
It's gone, its all done,
You know,those days, how time used to fly,
And now, the same slowed down it's pace, as I started to cry.
Wait! Cry! No, no, don't misinterpret,
It's just a photograph threat,
The life photograph threat,
That our pain, grief, regret, remorse, happiness create.
It was just yesterday,
Yes when the time was all gay,
When my bike seat got your habitual,
It just turned out an incident, not even auditual,
Now, I'll not remember those times,
The glory, the mistake and happy times,
The free birds of Jove,
Because that's just the glory of love,
"You never get one you want to have always,
But you crap out, to those who actually want you"
I am happy that you settled down,
Finally found someone to take to the ball, with your red gown,
I pray, he cares for you as I did,
Then, I can say, its really, splendid,
I hope, he loves you as I do,
Because such portions of the graph don't have a undo,
I guess, he give you things,
No matter, steal or brings,
Which I didn't give to you,
That sugar and the Chou,
I believe, your dreams are finally gonna be true,
Thank god, because, with me, they might had end up just a part of the queue,
Dear friend, why are you still so worried,
You are one day going to be his bride,
Still worried! Ok, I have a life-hack,
You live, freely, fearless, I'll always be there to get your back.
Ok now, I guess you should leave.
Stop, listen!
I know I'll not be the most special person in your life,
Nor I want to be,
But I expect, you to remember this face,
And wave a hand to me,
And if someone says my name,
You smile and say, 'Hey! That's my friend'
Don't forget me, baby,
It's just a cycle,
"Sometimes it last in love,
And sometimes, its just hurts and stay"
You find him,
I'll search, again, someone like you.
I'll still not remember the ake,
Cuz its not a heart break,
No its its not a heart break,
Oh my god! Yes! It's a heart break.

The Fade-Pink Evenings