PANGS OF LOVE

If it is not in my destiny to meet you
And this is your choice
Don't let me forget this
Let me live with this sorrow
Let me carry this pain.

Even when loud beats of music fills my ears
Even when I am surrounded by a crowd celebrating for me
Remind me i have not invited you
Let me live with this sorrow
Let me carry this pain.

Even when my pockets are full
Even when I have lost the capacity to gulp another spoon of my delicious dish
Remind me I have not served you
Let me live with this sorrow
Let me carry this pain.

Even when my cheeks starts paining due to lots of laughter
Even when I had been talking for hours
Remind me I didn't yet had a word with you
Let me live with this sorrow
Let me carry this pain.

The 'Decent' Murderers

'Explain it'

'I don't know if I can, but I can try a bit'

'you are leaving us with no option'

Spoiler alert: Its another tale describing one to million

'Its true, yes, I'm into her'

'shut this stupid non-sense. What happened last night there?'

'I'll describe, but I'm afraid,

Afraid that none of you might understand,

Lets leave it to humanity. I shall proceed'

'shut up! What you did?'

'I went for a walk, probably into  unknown suburbs,

Proper moonlit night, tough road, many shrubs,

It was celebration of the fate, I was somehow invited,

Surrounded by other ladies, she was there, gently seated,

I saw her, then she returned the sight,

She was typical to get at one, beautiful soul, sad eyes, hands tied,

Breaths low, forehead drenched in sweat, ears blotched,

Crying eyes, burning brain, legs weak,

No shoes, shot down foots, probably stepped bleak,

Body with tags, hungry heart, a watch on wrist,

Scratched linen, sparkling neighbors, tragic gist,

Dried lips, face colorless, red back'

'Is he diverting us? Shut the f#©< up, and get back'

'I approached, "May I join you?",

Her dissapointed eyes, squeezed heart, happy hands though,

"will you be able, its tough, this pain. No you can't!", she probably checked.

"You, get his stuff packed"

"I can, I surely can"

"Go. Go away, and impress some other, lies don't work on me, not a fan",

"Hold this hand. I promise to walk till end"

She held. Shaking nerves, weak fingers, she was probably terrified,

I played the blues. And...and we danced,

We danced till our legs didn't stopped,

We kissed, till our heart ached,

We traveled to infinity,

A place beyond the controls of deity,

We were ahead of time,

I felt her soul, she did mine,

We experienced immortality,

We shared pain, given by the city,

The return was difficult,

Laid in darkness, finished in cult,

But we were compelled,

The clock ran out, well,

Sadly, she was lost,

I couldn't find her, I searched a lot,

She was divine. Above you all.

I returned, she didn't. She fell.

She fell into painful-heaven.

She saw a dark-light,

She won a lost-fight.

She was free. She found herself,

She broke your chains, I helped her myself,

She was an angel, just you saw a witch,

You've turned a many of 'em, I'm sure of which,

Now its time for me to smile, and accept,

Yes I loved her. Like a magic, infact'

'why the hell are you laughing?'

'Look at you, stunned. I knew you won't understand'

'We don't care to. All we want to know is, if you did or not?',

'yes I did. I can roar that'

'Any apologies for bringing this shame to our society'

'I'm proud of it. Better you remove that strip off your eyes'

'Funny. Any last wish? Its on me'

'If you ever find her, convey this message, "I've left. Will meet you soon,

Waiting outside the oblivion of heaven and hell,

Just to see, which way you proceed,

I'll follow you there,

Cos I know, there's nothing like a heaven or hell,

But, you're BEAUTIFUL,

I'll miss you up there, but you better not die soon,

Live this new life,

Live it to the end. Bye", that's it'

'Execute'

A million of gun shots were recorded that day,

The sky turned yellow,

The land was painted red,

Most importantly, what newspaper read,

It was hilarious, on the face of humanity,

"A teenager broke into a brothel, managed to kidnap a prostitute. Found. Shot to death"

They killed a thought.

They ended up an era.

They.

They all.

The Melting Universe

If she's amazing, she won't be easy. If she's easy, she won't be amazing. If she's worth it, you won't give up. If you give up, you are not worthy. Truth is, everybody is going to hurt you; you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for.  - Bob Marley

The Lost Dew

After an hour long quarrel,
Finally she got off the barrel,
She fought with her father,
With those courage-flames she gather,
Finally there, following her heart,
In the winter roads, with the cold art,
Beauty, as she walks, no fear,
Keep going. Yes like that, dear,
Ear with plugged in earphones,
One after another stepping with tones,
Pupils relaxed, eyebrows stretched,
And the world, like perfectly sketched,
Enjoying the after meal walk,
Undirected, unplanned, wandering with just nature's talk,
Dark night, white fog, yellow lights, blue shoes,
Orange brain, yellow heart, red eyes, white boes,
Singing songs, waving hands,
Sharing smiles, living grands,
She stopped at sudden, there,
Wait let me see, n then share,
I don't know, what's bothering her,
There's not even any wild animal with fur,
Just two humans, teens probably, crossing the opposite way,Laughing aloud,
And now her eyes, look at her eyes, surrounded by fear cloud,
Her hands stoped waving,
Umm! Heart seems to start craving,
Her footsteps became quieter,
Body stiffed, hands lighter,
What makes her so feared?
Well, I know. The wicked smile of those guys, gives the complete gear,
Let me walk her by,
And get her clear through that guy,
As I went near, she's frightened,
'I'm here to help you, feel lightened'
'Stay away, I can manage,
The number is high on my gunnage'
She was lying, her voice shrank,
Her lips were shivering, eyes half closed, like fully drunk,
'okay. No offence. Don't worry keep walking,
Like the elephants moves and dogs keep barking'
I walked behind her, slowly,
Neck bent, like a jowly,
Saw those brutal animals pass,
No respect, no honour, no class,
'excuse me! Now can we just talk?'
'okay. And thanks, c'mon, lets have a walk'
The walk was silent,
Controlled steps, hearts violent,
'Nice weather!', just to start,
'ya', with a smirk on her heart,
'so nice to walk in winters', I added.
'well, only for you', she threaded,
'ohh, how come , not for you?,
The fog is same white for you too!',
'just only the god, not the animals,
And what else to say, other than that we are gals',
My heart melt, as she recited,
I knew where her words pointed,
Nothing was left to say,
Everything quiet, the street, grey,
A flashback ran in my mind,
Of all those sufferings, which binds,
'Can you elaborate?', just out of curiosity,
'leave it. It's just like the whole pond is dirty',
'what are you feared of exactly?',
'fear of not being alone', her thought, striking abruptly,
'okay'. You, getting her painful words?
'what else I should explain?! Many eyes, many worlds...'
I was lost, drowned into thoughts,
'...n moreover you won't understand', with her rough eyes, drought,
Now she kinda stomped on my heart,
Like when you do understand and not even offered a dart,
A moist film covered my eyes,
Now all those pride. Phew! Flies.
'this is my home. Thanks for the walk', with her eyes still, hands waving,
I managed to wear a smile,I was actually graving,
Weeks passed, she was never again seen,
That beautiful hummingbird, to fly, which was so keen,
Two papers, kept by my side,
Let's write a letter to her and slide,
"It's just a request, think over,
You are strong, don't shower,
Don't fail, never hit the end,
Don't bow, turn wherever you have to bend,
Don't loose, you are not meant to be,
Don't give up, let it be your strength to be,
Don't stop, its not your job,
Don't fear, no matter however big is the mob,
Be a fire, burn it all,
Be a storm, never fall,
Be a rain, never stop,
Be a smoke, never loose hope,
Be a river, never look back,
Be advanced, use the hack,
Be free, be among,
Live fast, die young",
And this one left, I should throw,second one,
Whosoever picks it up, hope to be a crooked one,
"Don't be brutal or a bully,
Respect, treat and let her live fully".

I Don't Care

Its all over now,
Fame, money, love, care,
Promises, trust, faith, vow,
Now I exist, nowhere.
Like the dried leaves rustle,
Then a spark cause fire,
Like the dead heart hustle,
Then a arrow make a vire.
I walked those a thousand like miles,
I creeped for everything good,
I struggled for my life to affiles,
Gathering those fake ornaments of coralwood.
You all just show support for a purpose,
Now, keep that deep inside your pockets,
Cuz your heart is too small for those heavy dose,
Or what u can do is, make a time being docket.
'Can you just tell what's wrong with you,
And why all of your poetry are so blue?'
(Ohh here you come again,
Really curious? Or just wanna hangout with my pain)
'blue poetry! The whole world is blue buddy,
Wanna make it red? Wanna celebrate or be bloody'
'I am not getting you, what are you saying,
What season are you through? Haying?'
'Ok, so you wanna know, what's there,
Let me recite, where my soul and pain cohere,
I feel like, burning inside,
Just wanna listen to shouts, by the brook side,
Everyone is playing me,
Surprised? Say gee,
I walk the silence stairs,
I peek the cruel stares,
Everyone has got a justification,
But I don't wanna listen to any of them,
Don't ask why? Wait. Let me tell
Ya, because it justifies them, and to rest its "Go To Hell",
Reason, cruelty and greed everywhere,
And money, they want in a hypersphere,
Sometimes I just feel to kill someone,
But I don't wanna outgrow Hitler, and be in lonesome,
Like tear them out, cut their flesh,
Drink their blood, and roar, bash,
There is a storm inside my head,
Don't compell me share my life. Its dread,
Everyone one is rushing,
But you know where do life rush? (sushing),
To death. The extreme joy,
Have you ever tasted it boy?
Its really calm, beautiful and fun,
Don't believe? Then why do whosoever dies forget to return?
You all will die some day,
That day, all of your "Life" will go away,
Its so great, it come same to all,
Be you take yourselves as to be brave, intelligent, great or tall,
But why humans turned the way they are,
Are you down there? Or I've came too far?
The bright souls are sleeping as dark slaves,
It'll all end up in the nature's graves,
So, now I don't care,
Any relation, religion, love or affair,
...'
'You're really gone,
By brain, not any muscle or bone,
Can I help you, in any way?
Ok not blue or red. How about grey?'
'ohh, you wanna help me,
What will you offer, tell me,
Cheap sex, red wine,
Or dark poison? Well, I don't mind,
Set me on fire, fry,
Beat me with blades, make me cry,
Poison will help, else,
If you want me to depulse,
Listen, do this for me,
Start living, don't yell as gimme,
Remove all these boundaries,
Religions, communities, race, gender, places, beliefs or countries,
Discuss ideas, not people,
Life is a ball, keep it on dribble,
Keep going on, make it worth living,
Stop taking, develope habit of giving,
Heaven is a place on earth with you,
Tell me if its not just true,
Learn to sacrife, don't worry for loss,
There no other destination then death. Make a toss!
Live it the way its meant to be,
Don't spend it, don't be crazy,
Or do whatever you want,
I don't wanna speak up, to be upfront,
Let me breath with rain,
Let me dance with pain,
Let me cry on what I've gained,
Let me enjoy, counting what I've stained,
Let me sit aside,
Watch you all hide,
Let me grawl,
Let me see love crawl,
Let me lie restless,
Let me drive reckless,
Let me tear this fake dress,
Let me break this heart necklace,
Let me set fire to the world,
This, which spin, twirl,
Let me love the disaster,
Let me bring death a bit faster,
You are still here? Go!
There stands the life, row'.

Thank You, Cruel World

'white lips, pale face,
Breathing in snow flakes',
Ed you describes me well,
This world, am living in, this hell,
These pictures, on the past-wall,
Beautiful now? Not at all,
Those memories, those smiles I had,
'you are my angel', my dad,
Turned black by the world so bad,
Sadly, now the angel is dead,
It was just an another beautiful morrow,
What did it gave? Pain, injustice, grief and sorrow!
Off the fans, dim the lights, shut the doors,
I don't want be out anymore,
Don't even stand by,and dare you to knock,
If you do, be ready for the alpenstock,
Just let me get away,
From what? Those murmurs and affray,
I don't like this sunlight,
Okay now! Hold me tight,
Else I will fall,
And give me a stiff cowl,
I don't trust these smiles you wear anymore,
You, you, you, and you all, what do you count it as? Your score?!
Somebody please call my dad,
For the sake of humanity, if you even had,
I don't feel safe anywhere now,
What are you talking about? That false vow?!
Ohh! Here dad. Come fast,
Make it up, before this body last,
"ya, doll what's the matter,
Stop crying, control this stammer, and utter,
Okay! Okay! Okay! Enough hugs,
What's this, louden this chugs"
I don't wanna say anything,
Is even there something left for? No nothing!
"dad! I wanted to say... That."
"okay! Speak it up. Don't be a bad hat"
What should I utter,
Yes what? These clutter?
Let these scratches shout,
Tell him, what's this all about,
There he goes, like me, numb,
I shout,"those shameless, brutal, beasts, those crumb"
"how?!", with those tears and forehead scar,
Then I recites him the worst story so far,
"don't let this out dear, don't"
I have to nodd, "yes, I won't!"
"you've to get married, don't get unacceptable"
Look who decides it. Those bloody amortizable,
He gets out. Marriage?! Hell no.!
And the reason?! Unacceptable. Ohh!
It just pass like that,
Wham, bam, and what? Guess. Splat,
It doesn't get booked,
Thanks to the society out, crooked,
Ya that f#<{!^g society,
What did it gave? This half paralysed body and anxiety,
You, outside, who always brag about standards and justice,
Save the world. Go. Apply a poultice,
Where did it drowned now. Lost it somewhere?
No? I know. Yes? Why are you arear,
Gently, pick up those heavy papers, the book, the cases,
And do one thing, please. Roll it and shove it up your @$$#$,
Now I don't believe you, anyone,
I say, there are always strings attached, to everyone,
Someone please stand up and fight back,
No one? Ok. Let me cry, paint this picture and put it in my rack,
I don't live now, I just survive,
Hopes, dreams? No. No more acclive,
I breath, it stales,
I climb, it fails,
You be proud, what are you worried about,
I guarantee, no one, not even myself will shout,
You roam, free, have fun,
I guarantee, no one, not even myself will listen,
Because, even I I will ask to,
"its your fault", they'll alto,
They'll listen, and pay attention,
When I commit suicide? I know its an ademption,
You know what? I don't care,
Let there be a social warfare,
Let me shout, am baked,
Let me die, I am girl who was raped.

Heart-Break

Its raining out,alkaline
With a heat flowing, upside down,
Some floods, washing out hearts,
With the brain playing darts,
A little fog in the eyes,
And a little pain, on the bed sides,
The arms numb,
Some of the breath storms,
Taking a silent perspiration shape
Yes! It's a heart Break.
Ok its better it to be talked 'bout,
Let me whisper what my heart shout,
It's not that am not happy,
No! But its better now, not to sound creepy,
You better go, live,
It's not a big deal, all you shook, is just my belief,
It's just a stomp, hard and heart one,
It's gone, its all done,
You know,those days, how time used to fly,
And now, the same slowed down it's pace, as I started to cry.
Wait! Cry! No, no, don't misinterpret,
It's just a photograph threat,
The life photograph threat,
That our pain, grief, regret, remorse, happiness create.
It was just yesterday,
Yes when the time was all gay,
When my bike seat got your habitual,
It just turned out an incident, not even auditual,
Now, I'll not remember those times,
The glory, the mistake and happy times,
The free birds of Jove,
Because that's just the glory of love,
"You never get one you want to have always,
But you crap out, to those who actually want you"
I am happy that you settled down,
Finally found someone to take to the ball, with your red gown,
I pray, he cares for you as I did,
Then, I can say, its really, splendid,
I hope, he loves you as I do,
Because such portions of the graph don't have a undo,
I guess, he give you things,
No matter, steal or brings,
Which I didn't give to you,
That sugar and the Chou,
I believe, your dreams are finally gonna be true,
Thank god, because, with me, they might had end up just a part of the queue,
Dear friend, why are you still so worried,
You are one day going to be his bride,
Still worried! Ok, I have a life-hack,
You live, freely, fearless, I'll always be there to get your back.
Ok now, I guess you should leave.
Stop, listen!
I know I'll not be the most special person in your life,
Nor I want to be,
But I expect, you to remember this face,
And wave a hand to me,
And if someone says my name,
You smile and say, 'Hey! That's my friend'
Don't forget me, baby,
It's just a cycle,
"Sometimes it last in love,
And sometimes, its just hurts and stay"
You find him,
I'll search, again, someone like you.
I'll still not remember the ake,
Cuz its not a heart break,
No its its not a heart break,
Oh my god! Yes! It's a heart break.

Molten-Grievances

Sometimes, we come across some people, some of the strange lives who force you to think, the course of human life.
The perfect life we want, is out there, in front of our eyes, but we are somehow unable to cross those barriers and are always left at the other side, in pain, wondering, WHEN?
Better, don't wait, and break it, it might hurt once or twice, but who cares man! At-least you would be there, where you always wanted to be. 

The Deep-Sad-Vigilance

She Lives The Poetry She Cannot Write

In the hot, terrific, scorching days,
I see you there, sitting, in the middle,
A strange, absurd, outta-bag expression,
Remains the geo of your face,
You are always smiling,
But deep inside your eyes,
I can see you sad, even when you smile,
This mean and cruel world had been hard on you,
You always look back deep in your past,
Which takes away your glow,
A thick fluid like flowing through your heart,
Your lips trying hard to open,
Like they want to just shout out loud,
Eyes filled with the saline water,
Deep inside like you just wanna cry, out aloud,
Your forehead shrank,
Things never went your way,
You always try living the life that your past could never had,
You are always scared,
Like a nightmare, you just woke up from,
You paint your nails black,
Your house black, and even your ball dress black,
Your smile black, with your lips red,
I tried to think, but can't get, why. Blood?
I have seen your like a thousand shades,
When you lie flat on the beach sand,
Over the hound island,
When you swim across pain,
When you crosses the emotion's lane,
When you sit silently in the park,
When you have that sweet lark,
When you walk dipped in thoughts,
When this world, really, no aught,
When you turn and smile,
Can't forget that pretty while,
No matter what's the situation,
You always ensure if I am alright,
At times, I have seen you crying hard,
Some of the blues playing in the back,
A little of the red wine spilled over,
Various of the antique jars broken,
With the broken glass having reflection of injustice,
The walls scratched with stories,
The snaps muffled with worries,
Everytime I close my eyes,
I see you there,
Crumbled, silent, in the dark paradise,
Couched on the other side,
I've seen your heart beats on your hands,
When you have a blind vigilance,
'what are you worried for,
You got me,
I am here, 'll be there,
Wherever you want me to be,
You just have to sail along,
I promise to resolve your life'.
Your life is still a 'x' for me.

The Hard-Black Scratches